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Asexual Men: Talking about issues facing asexual men in a highly sexualised world.

r/AsexualMen

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Posted by5 hours ago

Hello everyone. I recently started coming out as ace after years of denial and several failed relationships. Since I came out, however, I've been re-interogting past relationships and I'm starting to think that it wasn't just the sexual part of the relationships that were the problem, but the whole thing. I think of myself as a decent, attentive friend, but can be a pretty awful boyfriend, not responding to texts, refusing to open up, making excuses not to spend time or get close to the people I'm with. Could I be aro as well? Has anyone had similar experiences?

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Posted by18 hours ago

外围体育投注How to know if I have muscle fetish or I just prefer muscular guys? I’m 24 year old gay .. I didn’t have sex with a guy yet but I feel I’m attracted to guys I did have unpleasant sexual experience with a girl that was imposed on me and I didn’t enjoy it. Porn doesn’t turn me on. I have a fetish for being lifted by guys and jerk of to that... I’m worried that I wouldn’t enjoy sex with a guy either and that’s why I’m trying to find what I’m attracted to in a guy and what is just attraction vs maybe something along the lines of a fetish. Anyway hope I can get advice.-:)

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Posted by1 day ago

Heyya!

I’m a bisexual male, and about a year ago had this truly bizarre dream that set me to writing the epic lgbt fantasy novel my closeted ass wished existed.

Thing is, I want to write this well外围体育投注, like it is so important to do so.

外围体育投注Does anyone have any good sources of things to read so I can immerse myself into what feelings and thoughts my character, who just happens to be an asexual male, would have?

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Crossposted by4 days ago
Posted by4 days ago

外围体育投注Could asexuality and aromanticism be connected to personality disorders in some instances? In the psychological literature, a small amount of evidence has been presented suggesting potential overlap with schizoid personality disorder (characterized by emotional coldness and little interest for intimate relationships).

Brotto et al. (2010) conducted an exploratory survey of personal characteristics among a sample group of 187 self-identified asexual people recruited through AVEN. On personality measures they found elevated rates for social withdrawal, social inhibition, and emotionally cold/distant. In the qualitative portion of the study Brotto et al. (2010) interviewed 15 participants about whether they related to the characteristics of schizoid personality disorder. 7 of these participants felt that they did in fact meet the criteria.

Yule et al. (2013) endeavoured to assess mental health and interpersonal functioning within a sample group of 282 self-identified asexual people recruited mostly through AVEN. They found that asexual participants tended to have a socially avoidant and cold interpersonal style in comparison to members of the heterosexual and non-heterosexual control groups. Noting how these traits are associated with schizoid personality disorder, they concluded that further research is required to understand what if any connection might exist.

Over the years I've met the occasional aro/ace community member with schizoid personality disorder who perceived a connection. One reported participating on a schizoid support server where the general sentiment among members was that while they usually did experience sexual attraction, a combination of anhedonia and a dislike of affection caused them to be uncomfortable with sex to varying degrees and to rarely pursue sexual encounters. Reflecting on these experiences, this member expressed the view that feeling sexual attraction which they never desired to act on provided sufficient reason to self-identify as asexual.

外围体育投注As per usual, I'd like to conclude by inviting people to share input and relevant experiences. Have you seen indications of overlap between asexuality, aromanticism, and personality disorders? If so, what if anything do you think is the significance?


Brotto, Lori A., Gail Knudson, Jess Inskip, Katherine Rhodes, and Yvonne Erskine. “Asexuality: A Mixed-Methods Approach.” Archives of Sexual Behavior 39, no. 3 (2010): 599-618.

Yule, Morag A., Lori A. Brotto, and Boris B. Gorzalka. “Mental Health and Interpersonal Functioning in Self-Identified Asexual Men and Women.” Psychology & Sexuality 4, no. 2 (2013): 136-151.

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A subreddit for discussion around men who are asexual, and the challenges we face in a society that expects us not to be.
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Created Oct 4, 2015

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